


As We Sit By the Fire

by Whispers_of_Gallifrey



Category: Doctor Who, Doctor Who (1963)
Genre: Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/F, F/M, i hope this is okay and people like it - i tried, secret santa gift
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-24
Updated: 2018-01-24
Packaged: 2019-02-19 13:34:16
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,921
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13124793
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Whispers_of_Gallifrey/pseuds/Whispers_of_Gallifrey
Summary: Nyssa's being oddly quiet and Tegan wants to know why





	As We Sit By the Fire

**Author's Note:**

> I hate words- I don't know how to say them properly when doing this- I hope my actual writing is better!  
> Anyway, I wrote this for the Classic Who Secret Santa for @monsterficstien

There are approximately 17 sitting rooms in the TARDIS, all located somewhere within the vast confines of the Gallifreyan ship. Approximately because the TARDIS likes to change things up every so often and the Doctor is never entirely sure whether it’s a new room he’s stepped into or if it’s Room 3 but with a different carpet, or is it just Room 1 every time?

Anyway, this story takes place in what is probably Sitting Room 12, but it might be 18. In any case, it’s a room with sofas and armchairs and a fire.

The atmosphere of this room was warm and welcoming. The aforementioned fire crackled and flickered, casting dancing shadows across the walls. The scent of pine needles hung in the air- the source of which was a large tree in the corner. Despite its positioning, this was the centre piece of the room, adorned with sparkly tinsel and ornate baubles (in his 3rd regeneration, the Doctor tried to claim these had been given to him by a God-like creature in the Mutara Nebula, but Jo said they looked exactly like the ones she’d seen in the antiques shop last week.)

It was positively cosy, and should have been a room entirely at peace.

So naturally, an argument was taking place.

“I don’t understand, Doctor,” Turlough complained, “Why are we celebrating Christmas?”

“Because, Turlough, it’s been roughly a year- relatively speaking of course- since we last celebrated it. Besides it’s rather good fun!”

“It also means we get cake and presents!” Tegan chipped in helpfully

Turlough looked at her.

“Oh come on, Turlough! Don’t be such a Scrooge!”

“Doctor! Tegan’s using Earth culture references again!”

“Well, you should know that one- you went to school!”

“Yes, and I do not need to be reminded of the time spent listening to my English teacher droning on and on about how this guy was dead to begin with!”

The Doctor stepped between them, arms raised in defence. “Alright, alright you two. Tegan, stop winding him up- don’t argue- Turlough, we are celebrating Christmas as a group and that means getting on, okay? I’m not putting up with you two squabbling any more till this holiday is over.”

The two exchanged sullen glances (although both were on the verge of bursting into laughter at the other’s expression.)

“Right! Good that’s sorted. Now, I am going to see if there’s anywhere or time on Earth we could visit that you would enjoy.”

“Good luck actually arriving there,” Tegan muttered.

The Doctor gave her a look that told her he wasn’t even going to dignify that response with an answer, then left the room.

—

“All I wanted to know was why we only seem to celebrate Earth holidays- holidays from merely one religion at that! Why do we never do one of mine – or Nyssa’s?”

Tegan had been about to reply with ‘you barely talk about your home- it took an entire kidnapping for us to even know something!’, but the mention of Nyssa silenced her. Their companion was in the room, yet hadn’t spoken at all- which wasn’t unusual in itself- but she hadn’t even attempted to stop their bickering, which was unusual.

Glancing towards their peacemaker, they saw she sat in the armchair, gazing deeply into the fire. The soft glow reflected of something on her cheeks. Tear tracks.

Tegan and Turlough turned to face each other and, in the silence of their stare, they came to an understanding. Turlough mumbled a non-specific excuse and dashed out the door. Tegan made her way carefully over to Nyssa.

“Did Turlough really just mumble “a non-specific excuse”?” She joked.

Nyssa made no indication of having heard the quip and continued to observe the fire, as if it held all the answers.

Tegan’s demeanour changed in an instant, from sarcastic Australian, to concerned friend. She stepped closer, making to perch on the arm of the chair; slowly she reached her arm out to place it round the Trakenite’s shoulders.

At the contact, Nyssa glanced up, eyes glistening with untold sadness.

“Oh…Tegan, sorry I didn’t notice…” she trailed off, eyes returning to the fire.

“Hey, hey it’s alright,” Tegan’s usually abrasive voice was soft and soothing, “What’s the matter?”

“It’s n-nothing Tegan. I’m fine.” Nyssa dabbed at her eyes with the cuff of her jacket, carefully ignoring Tegan’s stare. It wasn’t a very convincing lie.

“If you don’t tell me, I’ll be forced to guess and you know what my guesses are like!”

Nyssa let out a shaky laugh at this, hopefully remembering the last Christmas the TARDIS team celebrated together, where they’d played charades and Tegan spent 10 minutes trying to guess what Adric was acting. Suddenly that moment felt, to her, like an eternity ago, and it must have felt even longer for Nyssa. When she’d left she’d been younger than Tegan, and now she was many years older.

And we’ve swapped one annoying brat for another, Tegan thought, trying to ignore the pang of grief tugging at her memories.

Her happy memories of all the banter, the frustration of all the arguments, the calm of the private moments she shared with Nyssa. Their family had changed so much-

That’s when it clicked.

Family.

“You- you miss your family don’t you?” she asked, emotions suddenly threatening to overwhelm her.

Nyssa nodded, then whispered, her voice catching slightly, “All of them.”

Tegan wasn’t certain on how to respond, so she asked: “Do you want to talk about it?”

–

Nyssa’s first instinct was to shake her head, but she knew bottling it up would only cause it to overflow at a later date- better get it done now, then she’d be better prepared to help others later.

Taking a deep breath (and a moment to consider her words) she began:

“All this talk of mentioning Christmas, it makes me think of all the other festivals and holidays in my life- making me realise all I’ve lost. I miss everything. I miss my family. My father, my mother, Kassia.

“On Traken we had this festival of light. It would be celebrated at the completion of every orbit our planet made of the sun, to remind us…”

The sun was beginning to set for the final time in that rotation. Dying rays of dazzling orange cast dark shadows across the land. It was not a scary sight; these shadows were dancing along with their owners, to the soft melodies that hung in the air. In a few moments, the lanterns would be lit, holding the light until it was the sun’s turn to lift it again. The festival would continue until the rays began to peak above the horizon, signifying the new beginnings for the Traken Union. Despite the advancing darkness, the atmosphere was light, laughter intertwined with the music and love was at the very core. The laughter and love were at their strongest between a group of three people. A man, a woman, and a young girl. The girl was wearing a brand-new dress; flowers adorned her chestnut hair. The other two were her parents, laughing at her joy as she swayed to the music, loving with all their hearts as she came back to them for hugs. They say Utopia cannot theoretically exist, but this must be the closest ever achieved.

–

Tegan’s own eyes were glistening with tears after listening to Nyssa recount the beauty that was Traken in the twilight.

“Wow…that sounds so…perfect…”

“It was. Back then, those nights felt like they would never end. But now-” She took a shaky breath. “But now they’ll never start again.”

Tegan gazed into Nyssa’s eyes. Eyes full of so much sorry and tragedy, but Tegan knew they could shine bright with hope and intelligence, and she’d do all she could to bring that back.

—

It was a few moments before either of them spoke, and when they did, they began discussing Nyssa’s children

“They’re the most wonderful children anyone could ever ask for. Neeka is strong and brave- she’s like you Tegan. A bit sarcastic and argumentative but she always knows what’s right. Adric is intelligent like his namesake – though he definitely eats less!” The two laughed gently at that.

“And Lasarti- he’s the most wonderful man I’ve ever met. He’s kind and…I love him”

Tegan tried to ignore the jealousy twisting at her heart. This was about Nyssa, not her feelings.

“Tell me more about them. What holidays do you celebrate on Terminus then?”

“The last thing we celebrated together was Lasarti’s birthday…"

The girl had spent hours trying to perfect the cake. It was slightly more difficult that synthesising an enzyme, but it was manageable. It had to be perfect. Her brother was creating a distraction to prevent their father from discovering the surprise, asking him hundreds of questions about his work- a topic the boy usually showed no interest in. When the cake was finally complete, the girl presented it with a flourish. Their father laughed in delight and declared it a masterpiece, although it was a little burned in places and she’d accidentally used salt instead of sugar in the top layer. Their mother looked on, smiling softly. Her son made the cake for her birthday and it had been an interesting mess of colour. They spent the evening playing games and the boy repeatedly refused to admit he was in the least bit tired because he’s a teenager now and doesn’t need to be told what to do. He fell asleep curled up to his sister, who fell asleep on top of him. The parents shared an adoring glace and decided to sleep in there with them.

"…And, despite all the horrors in the outside world, it was so cosy and peaceful…” Nyssa trailed off, the warm atmosphere fading like the embers in the fire “…t-that was the last time we ever spent together as a family”

“Nys…” Tegan replied softly, her heart breaking.

Nyssa brought her knees up to her chest and wrapped her arms around them. Tears ran anew down her cheeks.

“I lost my parents, Adric, my family. I lose everyone. I’m- I’m cursed! Don’t you see, Tegan, it’s only a matter of time till I lose you too!”

“You won’t lose me. I won’t leave you”

“You left before”

“No. You left me at Heathrow. And besides, you left too. But we both came back and that’s what matters.”

“You’ll get back to them, Nys. You’ll deliver the cure for Richters and save millions- billions of lives! You’ll become a universal hero and your children will love you more than ever!”

Nyssa lifted her head and gave a tearful smile. “I appreciate the sentiment Tegan, I wish I had your optimism.”

Tegan hugged her tightly, impulsively, “You will see your children again Nyssa. You will. They’ll be overjoyed to see you and you’ll celebrate so many holidays together” She paused, “…but at least make the most of these ones too”

Nyssa gazed up at Tegan, and returned the hug, “I will.” She pressed a kiss gently to her cheek and whispered

“Thank you”

—

“Ah, there you are,” the Doctor stepped into the room, “You know, I could have sworn this room was closer to the console room. Anyway, we’ve managed to land at a Frost Fair in London so if you…”

He trailed off as he noticed his two companions. They were curled up together like kittens in the armchair, fast asleep, expressions of peace and contentment on both of their faces.


End file.
